Month Seven: Hell or High Water

I've had a stone-cold sober weekend, and the entire day inside to myself. It's led to a lot of thinking. Clear, well-slept early morning kind of thinking.

This place is a total freak show. It's not unlike art school in that way. It's worse, actually. Or less intentionally ironic, anyhow. Well. I guess it's like art school in the first year, before 10% of the freshman class actually got carted off to mental hospitals when their hedging symptoms developed into full-blown disorders after being released from the confines of mom and dad in suburbia for longer than six months.

After that was when the intentional irony started.

And most of those people are still there. Being ironic.

I don't know how you meet decent people in Korea. I don't know how you meet decent people at art school, either. In the first case, I somehow managed in a least a couple of instances. Mostly, though, it ended up being a bric-a-brac collage of personality types that wouldn't have meshed under different circumstances, which rapidly crumbled once those circumstances changed. Sort of like high school. And everything else that came before it.

It's like life is this never ending marathon where you pull this giant oxcart behind you, and as you pass certain stations, shit randomly gets piled on. It stays there for a while, but most of it shifts off as you go along and more shit is piled on top of it.

Some of the shit sticks, though. Shit like Stepho and Magsy, I guess.

That's not really an ideal metaphor. But I think you see where this is going.

Anyway, it's depressing. And I'm tired of carting around random shit. And Korea has had a freakishly high turnover rate thus far.

Drinking in bars certainly doesn't help. But it does help pass the time.

I could say it's Magnes's fault I'm thinking about this, but before he even raised the issue, I'd already woken up thinking about it. And a longish conversation with the kid back home tonight brought it out in verbal form. The problem is, it's easy enough for him to blow off, since this isn't, as he puts it, his "real life". It's what I'm working with for the foreseeable future however.

I don't know. Can a foreigner ever really have a normal life in Korea? Semi-normal? Fractionally normal?

All I know is, I don't want to talk to "Gil" and I don't want to go home with "Ryan" and I don't want to meet Minsu's handsome man friend from her church, or go to a cafe "language exchange" every Friday night like some kind of Match.com paying member. I don't want to spend the next six months (2 years? 3 years?) awkwardly holding my beer while Seoyoung dances to Prince under black lights and tells me about his year abroad in New Zealand.

Good God. Is it really so much to ask?

It's so much, so bad, that about 9 am this morning found me standing by my kitchen sink with my phone in my hand, contemplating the ultimate faux pas.

Dear X.

We didn't have a terrible lot in common to begin with, other than both being alone in the bar. If I were to meet you back home, I would have probably labeled you a complete douchebag. But your douchebaggery somehow seems sort of like a gigantic middle finger to all the things that, socially, frustrate me about the culture you come from. What I liked about you then, and what has me thinking about you now, is that you simply do not give a fuck what absolutely anyone thinks about you. I know I kind of ignored your text messages and acted like a bit of a cold bitch. Where I come from, that's just sort of how things are done. Is there anyway we can forget about it now, though, and hang out sometime? Because I'm bored and I would like to have an honest conversation at least once a week.


I didn't do it. But fuck if I wasn't tempted.

Well. For the time being I'm somehow standing by my month seven prediction. Just because I have an eerie way with these things. Month Seven better be the month that something fucking real happens in this country. I'm getting kind of tired of amusing myself.


MikejGrey said...

Not that my "real" life is anything special. But I can't stomach this, this job coupled with the lifestyle is too rough on my pansy moisturized hands.

I mean it's 1030 and I'm going to bed. What's up with that?

We're nearly at month seven.

We need to try going to new places/neighborhoods again. Places that aren't chinatown. Because it failed here.

Sigh. Liz.

I'd almost suggest trying another country, but I have no idea if it's any better. Korea does seem to get all of the weirdos though.

I'm no Picasso said...

I'm starting to think I might actually take a trip for Children's Day. I haven't the foggiest clue where, and if I ask any of my coworkers, they're just going to say Jeju do. And I'm kind of afraid to travel around when everyone else is. But.


Next weekend we'll go see Klimt and go back to Kyobo, if you don't mind? And then next weekend, Tasha will finally be here....

Do you wanna try to do a temple stay at some point?

MikejGrey said...

I dunno about a temple stay. I'd like to visit one, but staying overnight and living like a monk.... would require some convincing.

We need to get to the DMZ at some point soon before it gets too hot, and we should hit the guidebooks again and look for new places to go.

Fucking hell

Also, can you send me that exercise you made for DO you know? I have to do that next week. And if you have anything decent for low level students.

I tried to make a I can but I wish exercise for my students based off th ebook

Like I can play soccer, but I wish I could play professionally. Or some nonesense like that.

I think it was a big mistake. Their heads can't comprehend.

Kel said...

1. i dont want to go to any more language exchange parties, either. i think i need to take a break from dion.
2. i was going to go to shanghai for spring break ( AKA children's day) but i waited toooo long to get tix and it's really expensive. trying to come up with a new plan now. i really wanted to leave the country. either way im going somewhere.
3. you should come to bundang sometime. it's a different world in a good way. a lot less crazies (except for me, of course...)

I'm no Picasso said...

Language exchange is not really language exchange, either, but conversational English practice/mild flirtation with the exotic dangers of contemplating dating a foreigner, while also having a socially acceptable excuse for having "some meeting" with them.

I don't know what the eff I'm gonna do for Children's Day. Probably stay inside and read, or throw a party celebrating the official end of The Nightmare Class.