11.04.2009
11.03.2009
It's not that I don't really love you; it's just that I don't really know.
I really feel like things with the Boyfriend crew have probably crossed a few different lines at this point. That having been said, I can't really be bothered to do anything about it.
There's been a lot of hubbub lately over one particular members' girlfriend, and how she's "loud, no manners, like man". The others claim not to like her, but today she was texting one of them, instead of her boyfriend, which was causing some drama. The boyfriend told me that he had ignored her text at first, and then she had answered the other guy's text before answering his. I asked why he ignored her to begin with, and that's when this little gem tumbled out:
"Teacher. With girl, must push pull."
"....I'm sorry. What did you just say?"
"With girl, must push pull. Means..."
"I know what it means. Where did you get that from? You're too young for that."
"No Teacher! True!"
"Yeah, yeah I know it's true... but push pull is dangerous. You know that?"
"How dangerous?"
"Just remember -- no matter how smart you are, girls are smarter."
"Huh?"
"Girls. Are smarter. Than you. Look. You pushed and now she's texting your friend. She can push pull, too."
The long and the short of it was, I ended up talking to her on video phone. Now. The boys are not supposed to have their phones out at school, but seeing as I was partaking in a little lunchtime texting of my own, I didn't feel like I could really get on them about that. However, video calling with their girlfriends might be going a bit far.
Ho hum. Remember, at least, while you're judging me, that I don't teach these boys anymore and won't again.
The other thing is that the boys found out last week that I have a peculiarly wide knowledge of the zodiac, and have been coming in to ask me what their signs mean. Of course, we've mixed this up with blood type as well. My only little AB is a little shorty who they all know I love, being that he's the constant target of my "Liz Teacher likes short men" speeches. What can I say? Ages ago, he did magic tricks for me, and he's been the apple of my eye ever since. They're always trying to tell me things to dissuade me from favoring him. Today they told me that, this weekend, he shouted derogatory things at a police officer and then ran away.
Now my boys know that generally, I do not approve of bad manners, so they were particularly crest-fallen when I found this funny, instead of appalling. "Teacher he no manners guy! Oh!" I told them I don't like policemen anyway.
And then the inevitable happened.
"What kind man teacher like?"
"...."
"Teacher like this kind?" Pointing to my little shorty crush.
"Yeah. I like that kind."
Shorty: "Assah!"
"OH NO! HE NO MANNERS GUY TEACHER!
"Teacher like A, AB! Why Teacher no like B? B best! A not active. A boring."
"My friend says I am like type A, anyway. Maybe that's why. We're the same."
"Oh! Teacher not A. Teacher B."
"No no no. I'm B in the classroom. But really, I'm A."
"OH NO! Teacher not A. I can't believe it."
In the background, my two A type students are quietly sweeping up, which is what they are all supposed to be doing, given that it's the cleaning period.
"You know what? I like this type of man. Right here. These As. Doing what they are supposed to be doing instead of screaming in my face. What good men!"
"TEACHER NO! THEY VERY BORING GUY! OH! NOT ACTIVE! NOT ACTIVE! OH I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!"
"No. This is what I like. Look. They are doing all of YOUR work."
"They not even talking Teacher! Why Teacher like?!"
"그냥."
"OH!"
At the moment, I've having a hard time organizing this weekend. Mostly because absolutely everything wants to happen on Saturday. I should consider what my priorities are, but in the end it all comes back to, my priorities are not breaking commitments, even if I really want to.
And my week is filling up rather quickly as well. Now, I'm taking advantage of my time at home to give the apartment a good (and much-needed) scrub down, as I don't know when I will have the chance again. And today, of course, I found out that tomorrow is some lame-ass business trip with the VP and P, which should be boatloads of fun. I'm having a great time, by the way, shocking Coteacher with my foreknowledge of these things, because I'm finally starting to be able to read the cool messages we all get in our in boxes at work. They are cool because the program is called "cool messenger" -- not because they are actually cool, by the way.
Oh. And The Baby started texting again today. I ignored it for the first four hours, and then I caved. Still can't bring myself to make any kind of elaborate, enthusiastic reply. But I can't bring myself to just ignore him either. I did tell him that I'm not really going out or drinking much anymore, that I want to focus on other things (and people) for a while. This comes on the tails of me chastising him muchly, when we were alone for the first three hours of his birthday, about his daily drinking habits, which I see as borderline alcoholic, and extremely (emotionally) dangerous for someone of his age -- no twenty year old should be downing a six pack or two bottles of soju in their house alone every single night of the week, and then drinking themselves silly (often alone) at bars on others. Something's not right with that.
He responded, in kind, that he's also focusing on other things, for the time being. Well I hope that, at least, isn't a lie.
Zing.
There's been a lot of hubbub lately over one particular members' girlfriend, and how she's "loud, no manners, like man". The others claim not to like her, but today she was texting one of them, instead of her boyfriend, which was causing some drama. The boyfriend told me that he had ignored her text at first, and then she had answered the other guy's text before answering his. I asked why he ignored her to begin with, and that's when this little gem tumbled out:
"Teacher. With girl, must push pull."
"....I'm sorry. What did you just say?"
"With girl, must push pull. Means..."
"I know what it means. Where did you get that from? You're too young for that."
"No Teacher! True!"
"Yeah, yeah I know it's true... but push pull is dangerous. You know that?"
"How dangerous?"
"Just remember -- no matter how smart you are, girls are smarter."
"Huh?"
"Girls. Are smarter. Than you. Look. You pushed and now she's texting your friend. She can push pull, too."
The long and the short of it was, I ended up talking to her on video phone. Now. The boys are not supposed to have their phones out at school, but seeing as I was partaking in a little lunchtime texting of my own, I didn't feel like I could really get on them about that. However, video calling with their girlfriends might be going a bit far.
Ho hum. Remember, at least, while you're judging me, that I don't teach these boys anymore and won't again.
The other thing is that the boys found out last week that I have a peculiarly wide knowledge of the zodiac, and have been coming in to ask me what their signs mean. Of course, we've mixed this up with blood type as well. My only little AB is a little shorty who they all know I love, being that he's the constant target of my "Liz Teacher likes short men" speeches. What can I say? Ages ago, he did magic tricks for me, and he's been the apple of my eye ever since. They're always trying to tell me things to dissuade me from favoring him. Today they told me that, this weekend, he shouted derogatory things at a police officer and then ran away.
Now my boys know that generally, I do not approve of bad manners, so they were particularly crest-fallen when I found this funny, instead of appalling. "Teacher he no manners guy! Oh!" I told them I don't like policemen anyway.
And then the inevitable happened.
"What kind man teacher like?"
"...."
"Teacher like this kind?" Pointing to my little shorty crush.
"Yeah. I like that kind."
Shorty: "Assah!"
"OH NO! HE NO MANNERS GUY TEACHER!
"Teacher like A, AB! Why Teacher no like B? B best! A not active. A boring."
"My friend says I am like type A, anyway. Maybe that's why. We're the same."
"Oh! Teacher not A. Teacher B."
"No no no. I'm B in the classroom. But really, I'm A."
"OH NO! Teacher not A. I can't believe it."
In the background, my two A type students are quietly sweeping up, which is what they are all supposed to be doing, given that it's the cleaning period.
"You know what? I like this type of man. Right here. These As. Doing what they are supposed to be doing instead of screaming in my face. What good men!"
"TEACHER NO! THEY VERY BORING GUY! OH! NOT ACTIVE! NOT ACTIVE! OH I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!"
"No. This is what I like. Look. They are doing all of YOUR work."
"They not even talking Teacher! Why Teacher like?!"
"그냥."
"OH!"
At the moment, I've having a hard time organizing this weekend. Mostly because absolutely everything wants to happen on Saturday. I should consider what my priorities are, but in the end it all comes back to, my priorities are not breaking commitments, even if I really want to.
And my week is filling up rather quickly as well. Now, I'm taking advantage of my time at home to give the apartment a good (and much-needed) scrub down, as I don't know when I will have the chance again. And today, of course, I found out that tomorrow is some lame-ass business trip with the VP and P, which should be boatloads of fun. I'm having a great time, by the way, shocking Coteacher with my foreknowledge of these things, because I'm finally starting to be able to read the cool messages we all get in our in boxes at work. They are cool because the program is called "cool messenger" -- not because they are actually cool, by the way.
Oh. And The Baby started texting again today. I ignored it for the first four hours, and then I caved. Still can't bring myself to make any kind of elaborate, enthusiastic reply. But I can't bring myself to just ignore him either. I did tell him that I'm not really going out or drinking much anymore, that I want to focus on other things (and people) for a while. This comes on the tails of me chastising him muchly, when we were alone for the first three hours of his birthday, about his daily drinking habits, which I see as borderline alcoholic, and extremely (emotionally) dangerous for someone of his age -- no twenty year old should be downing a six pack or two bottles of soju in their house alone every single night of the week, and then drinking themselves silly (often alone) at bars on others. Something's not right with that.
He responded, in kind, that he's also focusing on other things, for the time being. Well I hope that, at least, isn't a lie.
Zing.
11.02.2009
I don't usually do this, but....
.... it's pretty indicative of how things are going at the moment:
c says:
oh yeah both of us
staring new life
feels like
when we have a chance
we should more try
to get it
for not to miss it
Lizzo says:
youre right.
c says:
at least we should try
even sucess or not
ok i will try man
i hope u too
Lizzo says:
you know what it feels like though?
maybe you feel this too.
like standing under an apple tree and suddenly the apples are falling. but you have to catch them all.
afraid you might drop one.
or miss one.
c says:
lol
Lizzo says:
you know?
c says:
it's ok some of them drop
enough apple is fine to me
just i want to the apple taste
just fit me
God. I just quit Korean class to clear out my schedule and have a little time to relax, but suddenly all these other things are falling into place. It's going to be a busy season after all. Also, a strange number of people have suddenly been in touch, including a girl from Pratt who I didn't know that well, but who was really excellent, who somehow has ended up in Korea as well. Very excited to see her again, and catch up.
In other news, if you want to act like a little bastard in my class, it would be a good idea not to let me catch you talking to your Seonbae, who's favorite teacher I happen to be. Otherwise, you'll end up cowering and directing the class to behave themselves every time I mention your Seonbae by name, after warning you that if you screw up, I'll tell him you made me cry. It would also help if your Seonbae wasn't a freakishly muscular (for his age) boxer.
Just sayin'.
c says:
oh yeah both of us
staring new life
feels like
when we have a chance
we should more try
to get it
for not to miss it
Lizzo says:
youre right.
c says:
at least we should try
even sucess or not
ok i will try man
i hope u too
Lizzo says:
you know what it feels like though?
maybe you feel this too.
like standing under an apple tree and suddenly the apples are falling. but you have to catch them all.
afraid you might drop one.
or miss one.
c says:
lol
Lizzo says:
you know?
c says:
it's ok some of them drop
enough apple is fine to me
just i want to the apple taste
just fit me
God. I just quit Korean class to clear out my schedule and have a little time to relax, but suddenly all these other things are falling into place. It's going to be a busy season after all. Also, a strange number of people have suddenly been in touch, including a girl from Pratt who I didn't know that well, but who was really excellent, who somehow has ended up in Korea as well. Very excited to see her again, and catch up.
In other news, if you want to act like a little bastard in my class, it would be a good idea not to let me catch you talking to your Seonbae, who's favorite teacher I happen to be. Otherwise, you'll end up cowering and directing the class to behave themselves every time I mention your Seonbae by name, after warning you that if you screw up, I'll tell him you made me cry. It would also help if your Seonbae wasn't a freakishly muscular (for his age) boxer.
Just sayin'.
10.31.2009
Bring on the waegs.
Oh. OH.
So fucking....
I cannot wait to hang out with foreigners tonight.
Look. I know we're all human beings and all the same and blah blah fucking blah. But anybody who's ever been on either side of the cultural divide will tell you, sometimes you need to just hang with your "own". Where you know your personality, your sense of humor and your way of interacting are all (mostly) perfectly acceptable. And more importantly, people "get" you.
I realize that isn't a PC thing to say. But someone who has lived abroad before (foreign or Korean), please contradict me on this. You know we all have our moments.
Bring on the waegs.
P.S. -- Willie's dressing as a high school student. 변태선생님.
I want to hear at least ten dirty jokes tonight, and somebody better touch me inappropriately. See you dirty foreigners in Itaewon.
(The weather today reminds me of this song, which was once used in a life-changing lecture we attended in high school given by a journalist we were in love with, as an example of how to properly tell "The Story".)
So fucking....
I cannot wait to hang out with foreigners tonight.
Look. I know we're all human beings and all the same and blah blah fucking blah. But anybody who's ever been on either side of the cultural divide will tell you, sometimes you need to just hang with your "own". Where you know your personality, your sense of humor and your way of interacting are all (mostly) perfectly acceptable. And more importantly, people "get" you.
I realize that isn't a PC thing to say. But someone who has lived abroad before (foreign or Korean), please contradict me on this. You know we all have our moments.
Bring on the waegs.
P.S. -- Willie's dressing as a high school student. 변태선생님.
I want to hear at least ten dirty jokes tonight, and somebody better touch me inappropriately. See you dirty foreigners in Itaewon.
(The weather today reminds me of this song, which was once used in a life-changing lecture we attended in high school given by a journalist we were in love with, as an example of how to properly tell "The Story".)
10.30.2009
Lately.
Would you really think I would be above it?
Well, you would be wrong.
I spent the majority of my time today making the third graders dance for candy. Why? Because all my classes got canceled and I was bored and because I could. They bum-rushed the EOZ at lunchtime, and by the time I made it up there, there were approximately sixty clambering boys, climbing over each other and shouting, "TEACHA! TRICK OR TREAT! CHUPA CHUP! I LOVE YOU!"
"WHOA! Wait a minute... where's my present?"
They consulted amongst themselves for a moment and then, in a beautifully synchronized show, all put their hands to their chests and declared, "Teacha present my heart!"
"Oh. No thank you. HEY MAKE A LINE! Animals...."
Of course, I noticed about five minutes in that there was some sort of looping effect going on with the line. Today was the day they learned for a fact that their weoneomin can tell them apart. And they now think "go away" means something equivalent to, "I already gave you candy," a la: "Happy Halloween. Happy Halloween. You -- go away. Happy Halloween. You -- go away."
They started policing each other, in case one slipped past my excellent memory: "NOOOO! TEACHA HE GO AWAY!"
I got the Sorry Sorry dance, the Abracadabera dance, the Nobody Nobody But You dance and the Again and Again dance. And a few rather creative free-style numbers. A few tried their hand at sekshi dacing, American style. In those cases, I told them I would give them candy to stop and promise never to do that again, especially in front of a girl.
And, of course, there was:
In other news, it turns out my after school classes are going to continue even though I was told I had the choice to stop them before I went home for vacation, and said I would prefer to (at that time planning to continue on with Korean classes). I don't really mind, because I was feeling rather disappointed that they were ending anyway. Other than the fact that I feel like I was pretty well ignored. But I guess I won't make an issue out of it. Chances were, it was probably just a misunderstanding anyway.
The poor boys, however, were under the impression (because I was under the same impression) that they wouldn't have a seven period anymore. I had to break the news to them yesterday. One mouthy (but overall decent) student was kicking up a particularly loud stink about the whole thing, while I was explaining that I'm just the weoneomin -- not the principal: I just obey, and if they have a problem with it, they have to take it to the Korean teachers. "TEACHA WHY! WHYYYYYYYYYYYY!" This continued on until I finally feigned anger and stopped talking.
The class settled into a deadly silence.
"Listen... here's the real reason we have more seven classes.... okay? Ready?"
"Ready..."
"It's because I love you so much that I can't let you go."
"TEACHA!!! OOOH!"
"No really! I love you so much that I want to teach you everyday for the rest of my life! I love making millions of copies of all these books for you! Everyday, it's my dream to hear you complain about the worksheets! My life is nothing without this!"
"TEACHAAAAA!"
"What? You don't believe that?"
"NO!"
"Then be quiet. It's not my choice either. We have to endure."
I'm finally winning those last two little pains in the ass over, as well. The 기분 in the classroom lately has just been too good for them to stay grumpy. And the final straw came yesterday, when Mr. King of the Grumpy Pants managed to embarrass even himself. Just as silence settled over the classroom, as the other students saw I was preparing to start reading, he somehow managed to shout "개새끼!" at his friend. The entire class took a deep breath in and the burst out laughing, as they saw my face and suddenly knew that I understood.
He turned toward me, wide-eyed.
"Was that like... just in general? Or what?"
He turned to his friend for translation. "몰라...."
"네?"
"Who was that for?"
Back to his friend. "누구! 누구!"
"아! 이...." Pointing at another student.
"Well, okay then. Glad we sorted that out. Can I read now?"
"네."
"Okay good. Here we go...."
Today Mr. Grumpy was a lot more cooperative, and, instead of gazing out of the window or drooling on himself, throwing bits of eraser or smacking his friend in the back of the head with his folder, he instead made a game out of calling me over as often as possible, away from the other students, to ask questions.
"TEACHA!"
"One minute."
"TEACHA!"
"One minute."
"TEACHA!"
"Oh my god..."
Everyone laughs.
He's a star in the show, now. That seems to have made him happy enough. So we're right on track. The other problem student is just a bit of a weirdo, but today he was petting my arm and playing with my bracelet while I was helping Mr. Grumpy Pants, so I guess we've made friends now too.
Looking forward to busting their little asses with the new chapter books I've procured. You wanna complain the material is too easy, eh? Okay then. Here we go.
Well, you would be wrong.
I spent the majority of my time today making the third graders dance for candy. Why? Because all my classes got canceled and I was bored and because I could. They bum-rushed the EOZ at lunchtime, and by the time I made it up there, there were approximately sixty clambering boys, climbing over each other and shouting, "TEACHA! TRICK OR TREAT! CHUPA CHUP! I LOVE YOU!"
"WHOA! Wait a minute... where's my present?"
They consulted amongst themselves for a moment and then, in a beautifully synchronized show, all put their hands to their chests and declared, "Teacha present my heart!"
"Oh. No thank you. HEY MAKE A LINE! Animals...."
Of course, I noticed about five minutes in that there was some sort of looping effect going on with the line. Today was the day they learned for a fact that their weoneomin can tell them apart. And they now think "go away" means something equivalent to, "I already gave you candy," a la: "Happy Halloween. Happy Halloween. You -- go away. Happy Halloween. You -- go away."
They started policing each other, in case one slipped past my excellent memory: "NOOOO! TEACHA HE GO AWAY!"
I got the Sorry Sorry dance, the Abracadabera dance, the Nobody Nobody But You dance and the Again and Again dance. And a few rather creative free-style numbers. A few tried their hand at sekshi dacing, American style. In those cases, I told them I would give them candy to stop and promise never to do that again, especially in front of a girl.
And, of course, there was:
In other news, it turns out my after school classes are going to continue even though I was told I had the choice to stop them before I went home for vacation, and said I would prefer to (at that time planning to continue on with Korean classes). I don't really mind, because I was feeling rather disappointed that they were ending anyway. Other than the fact that I feel like I was pretty well ignored. But I guess I won't make an issue out of it. Chances were, it was probably just a misunderstanding anyway.
The poor boys, however, were under the impression (because I was under the same impression) that they wouldn't have a seven period anymore. I had to break the news to them yesterday. One mouthy (but overall decent) student was kicking up a particularly loud stink about the whole thing, while I was explaining that I'm just the weoneomin -- not the principal: I just obey, and if they have a problem with it, they have to take it to the Korean teachers. "TEACHA WHY! WHYYYYYYYYYYYY!" This continued on until I finally feigned anger and stopped talking.
The class settled into a deadly silence.
"Listen... here's the real reason we have more seven classes.... okay? Ready?"
"Ready..."
"It's because I love you so much that I can't let you go."
"TEACHA!!! OOOH!"
"No really! I love you so much that I want to teach you everyday for the rest of my life! I love making millions of copies of all these books for you! Everyday, it's my dream to hear you complain about the worksheets! My life is nothing without this!"
"TEACHAAAAA!"
"What? You don't believe that?"
"NO!"
"Then be quiet. It's not my choice either. We have to endure."
I'm finally winning those last two little pains in the ass over, as well. The 기분 in the classroom lately has just been too good for them to stay grumpy. And the final straw came yesterday, when Mr. King of the Grumpy Pants managed to embarrass even himself. Just as silence settled over the classroom, as the other students saw I was preparing to start reading, he somehow managed to shout "개새끼!" at his friend. The entire class took a deep breath in and the burst out laughing, as they saw my face and suddenly knew that I understood.
He turned toward me, wide-eyed.
"Was that like... just in general? Or what?"
He turned to his friend for translation. "몰라...."
"네?"
"Who was that for?"
Back to his friend. "누구! 누구!"
"아! 이...." Pointing at another student.
"Well, okay then. Glad we sorted that out. Can I read now?"
"네."
"Okay good. Here we go...."
Today Mr. Grumpy was a lot more cooperative, and, instead of gazing out of the window or drooling on himself, throwing bits of eraser or smacking his friend in the back of the head with his folder, he instead made a game out of calling me over as often as possible, away from the other students, to ask questions.
"TEACHA!"
"One minute."
"TEACHA!"
"One minute."
"TEACHA!"
"Oh my god..."
Everyone laughs.
He's a star in the show, now. That seems to have made him happy enough. So we're right on track. The other problem student is just a bit of a weirdo, but today he was petting my arm and playing with my bracelet while I was helping Mr. Grumpy Pants, so I guess we've made friends now too.
Looking forward to busting their little asses with the new chapter books I've procured. You wanna complain the material is too easy, eh? Okay then. Here we go.
10.29.2009
Lover, you should have come over.
This song brings back so many memories, it's not even funny. In fact, this whole album does. Mostly of my first winter in New York, my first trips home after I had left, working on that godforsaken novel for the ridiculously attempted one semester novel writing class (I didn't even do fiction, to begin with), and everything that was wrapped up in that time.
I've been talking to a young Korean (who is currently studying in Canada) a lot lately. Mostly, he's been wanting advice surrounding his first attempts, after living in Canada for several years, at dating Western women. It's interesting discussing the differences, and trying to make him understand the ways in which he has to be more patient with "foreign" women. It's also interesting that our relationship is, due to distance, mostly anonymous, and therefore we talk quite freely. It's kind of a great situation, because we're both experiencing being a "foreigner" in each other's cultures, and we can compare and contrast, both having a reasonable working knowledge of both, while also filling the other in on what they may not already know or understand.
The other night, he got his heart stomped on and asked me to phone him to talk while he was falling asleep. He makes me feel really old, mostly because I remember being that age and feeling like absolutely everything in love was the end of the world. I found myself explaining to him that he will mellow with time, and in a few years, he will find himself to be a lot calmer.
He said, "You mean I will become less passionate?"
"No. That's not what I mean. I mean you will become less panicked. You will know, when you have these feelings, 'Okay. I survived this before. I can survive this again.' Whereas now, all you can think is, 'I really think I'm actually going to die.' In time, you will find out that getting your heart broken is not the end of the world."
And you will learn your own patterns, learn how to recognize and follow them. Hopefully learn how to change them, if need be.
Even now, he's just sent me this song:
And I'm trying to explain, when I was younger, that's how it was. You fall in love with someone when you know it can't work out. You fall in love with someone you know is damaged, and who will damage you. But these days, I don't even turn my head for that anymore. These days, I don't mind rational. I want someone who I'm good for, and who is good for me. Someone it has a chance of working with. Balanced, relaxed and healthy.
God knows I've not had loads of experience. It seems like almost everyone in this world 'falls in love' at the drop of a hat. But that's not how I work. I'd be quite unhappy if it was. But I think the experiences I have had have been that much more valid because of this. It doesn't happen often, but when it does....
I don't know what I'm getting at with all of this. This time of year just makes me so damn nostalgic. And every single time I've loved someone, it has started in the fall. Both my moves to New York and to Korea happened in the fall. It's a strongly accented season, for me.
I wish Mike were here right now. It would be a good weekend for mostly lying low, grabbing a cup of coffee and mulling over a lot of nothing. I want familiar things at this time of year. But. I'll see the lovely Kelly and Willie on Saturday night, and be around other foreigners, which should help a little.
In other news, 형 came to see me in the EOZ today. The kid barely moves out of his chair, ordinarily. Well. The kid hardly moves ordinarily. I'll take it as a good sign.
10.28.2009
I'm cold and 형.
Oh my God I'm so cold.
It's always like this. Although I've lived in a climate that has actual winters for seven years now, the first couple of months of the weather changing are still almost unbearable for me. I'm freezing everywhere I go, no matter what I wear, at all hours of the day. Making myself get out from under the blankets in the morning is a Herculean task, as is making myself stay out from under the blankets once I get home in the evening. And it doesn't really help that I'm almost 40 kilos lighter than I was this time last year.
According to weather.com, it's only 64 degrees. But I am fucking dying. The only time I'm not cold is when I'm teaching.
It's making life particularly difficult at the moment, because I absolutely have to get down to Homeplus and do some proper shopping. Muuuh. Is it too early to start wearing gloves?
Ah. The boys have been so great this week. I finally finished my after school classes today, and I'm reconsidering the decision not to do another session, just because working with them has been really great this time around. Seeing the same boys everyday is just plain nice -- I know all their names, and (I know this is ultimately not a good thing, but) they just communicate with me freely in both Korean and English now. They love that when it comes time to demonstrate a dialogue or activity in our regular English classes, I call out their names and ask them for their answers in front of everyone.
I also got to star in two more movies today. They haven't gotten around to trying to make me speak Korean on film yet, thank God. I love watching them be creative -- I can't remember me or anyone I knew being that smart at that age.
On the flip side of things, after lunch today class 313 had pulled up a 소녀시대 video on the big screen in the classroom and were freeze framing it at the exact moment 태연 thrust out her chest over and over again. They can't be geniuses all the time.
I've gotten into a habit of harassing one of Coteacher's students -- we'll call him 형, because that's what all the other boys call him, given that he's two years older. He's fucking massive and scary looking, if I do say so myself. He's the student who has somehow managed to give himself a tattoo. His background is shitty, to say the least -- earlier in the year his father came into the teachers' office drop-dead drunk and reeking of 소주, toting a huge tree branch he meant to beat 형 with. 형 is coming to school these days in body only -- he sits at his desk and sleeps and snarls and swings on any student who approaches. He makes the other boys extremely nervous.
So, of course, I have to stir the pot. I've given him the nickname Sunshine, much to the amusement of the other boys, who gather around in a clan everyday when I come in to wake him up. "Wake up Sunshine!"
He's the only student I speak Korean to openly and regularly. Coteacher calls him into the office sometimes to have little co-meetings with me, because she believes he'll be able to connect to me more easily than anyone else at the school. She's told him a bit about my own background (what little she knows) and always makes me show him my Korean study books -- "See? The weoneomin started from 'ahnyeonghaseyo' and look what she can do now! Everyday she faces more challenges than you. She is here without a family, but she is strong and she endures."
He mostly didn't respond to me at all, for a long time, until one day I followed Coteacher in when she was trying to wake him up to eat. He swatted her hand away, and some sort of ghetto protective instinct in me took over. I grabbed him by the neck and pulled him up. "Hey! You listen to your teacher when she's talking to you! You are still a student...." Since then, he sits up when he hears my English and feels my hand on the back of his neck. He mutters his Korean so I can almost never understand him, but he always speaks in the honorific conjugation, which is too out-of-place to not find funny.
God. I wish I spoke more Korean. Everybody in that school building is afraid of this kid. But I know he's just a kid, and he's being a baby at that. Coteacher translates for me sometimes, and he knows that my opinion is that life is hard, and not fair, but you have two choices -- you can succeed or you can fail. Nobody is going to do this kid any favors by coddling him -- it's gone too far for that. His situation is too hard. He's going to have to man up if he wants to make something of himself. It's not right that he has to be a man at his age, but that's the way things are. He should have a mother at home to push him out of bed in the morning, to nag him into doing his homework. But he doesn't. So he's going to have to be responsible for himself.
I told him before, through Coteacher, you think these teachers are always nagging you, but what do they care anyway? It's not their life -- it's your life. When you push against them, you push against yourself. When you think you're punishing them, you're really only punishing yourself.
Poor 형.
It's always like this. Although I've lived in a climate that has actual winters for seven years now, the first couple of months of the weather changing are still almost unbearable for me. I'm freezing everywhere I go, no matter what I wear, at all hours of the day. Making myself get out from under the blankets in the morning is a Herculean task, as is making myself stay out from under the blankets once I get home in the evening. And it doesn't really help that I'm almost 40 kilos lighter than I was this time last year.
According to weather.com, it's only 64 degrees. But I am fucking dying. The only time I'm not cold is when I'm teaching.
It's making life particularly difficult at the moment, because I absolutely have to get down to Homeplus and do some proper shopping. Muuuh. Is it too early to start wearing gloves?
Ah. The boys have been so great this week. I finally finished my after school classes today, and I'm reconsidering the decision not to do another session, just because working with them has been really great this time around. Seeing the same boys everyday is just plain nice -- I know all their names, and (I know this is ultimately not a good thing, but) they just communicate with me freely in both Korean and English now. They love that when it comes time to demonstrate a dialogue or activity in our regular English classes, I call out their names and ask them for their answers in front of everyone.
I also got to star in two more movies today. They haven't gotten around to trying to make me speak Korean on film yet, thank God. I love watching them be creative -- I can't remember me or anyone I knew being that smart at that age.
On the flip side of things, after lunch today class 313 had pulled up a 소녀시대 video on the big screen in the classroom and were freeze framing it at the exact moment 태연 thrust out her chest over and over again. They can't be geniuses all the time.
I've gotten into a habit of harassing one of Coteacher's students -- we'll call him 형, because that's what all the other boys call him, given that he's two years older. He's fucking massive and scary looking, if I do say so myself. He's the student who has somehow managed to give himself a tattoo. His background is shitty, to say the least -- earlier in the year his father came into the teachers' office drop-dead drunk and reeking of 소주, toting a huge tree branch he meant to beat 형 with. 형 is coming to school these days in body only -- he sits at his desk and sleeps and snarls and swings on any student who approaches. He makes the other boys extremely nervous.
So, of course, I have to stir the pot. I've given him the nickname Sunshine, much to the amusement of the other boys, who gather around in a clan everyday when I come in to wake him up. "Wake up Sunshine!"
He's the only student I speak Korean to openly and regularly. Coteacher calls him into the office sometimes to have little co-meetings with me, because she believes he'll be able to connect to me more easily than anyone else at the school. She's told him a bit about my own background (what little she knows) and always makes me show him my Korean study books -- "See? The weoneomin started from 'ahnyeonghaseyo' and look what she can do now! Everyday she faces more challenges than you. She is here without a family, but she is strong and she endures."
He mostly didn't respond to me at all, for a long time, until one day I followed Coteacher in when she was trying to wake him up to eat. He swatted her hand away, and some sort of ghetto protective instinct in me took over. I grabbed him by the neck and pulled him up. "Hey! You listen to your teacher when she's talking to you! You are still a student...." Since then, he sits up when he hears my English and feels my hand on the back of his neck. He mutters his Korean so I can almost never understand him, but he always speaks in the honorific conjugation, which is too out-of-place to not find funny.
God. I wish I spoke more Korean. Everybody in that school building is afraid of this kid. But I know he's just a kid, and he's being a baby at that. Coteacher translates for me sometimes, and he knows that my opinion is that life is hard, and not fair, but you have two choices -- you can succeed or you can fail. Nobody is going to do this kid any favors by coddling him -- it's gone too far for that. His situation is too hard. He's going to have to man up if he wants to make something of himself. It's not right that he has to be a man at his age, but that's the way things are. He should have a mother at home to push him out of bed in the morning, to nag him into doing his homework. But he doesn't. So he's going to have to be responsible for himself.
I told him before, through Coteacher, you think these teachers are always nagging you, but what do they care anyway? It's not their life -- it's your life. When you push against them, you push against yourself. When you think you're punishing them, you're really only punishing yourself.
Poor 형.
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