2.13.2011

Personal nonsense rambling.

What a complete and utterly lovely weekend I've had. It's been a long time since I've written anything about the personal life in this blog, because it always feels a bit awkward for whatever reason now, but I'm afraid I've got little else to offer in the next couple of weeks, while work is on hold and I won't be teaching classes. So, a bit of a blow-by-blow, then. For old time's sake.

Friday night was two bottles of wine and me nervously cooking chicken and broccoli penne alfredo, which was given rave reviews, no doubt out of kindness alone. Anyway, it was eaten. I guess now's as good a time as any to give the guy a name. We'll call him Busan.

Saturday morning blended into Saturday afternoon, a bit lazy and slow with coffee and ordered-in Chinese. Finally, in the evening, the girls (Dating in Korea and It's Daejeon Darling) made it out to my humble city. We sat in watching ridiculous things on the internet, generally gossiping and cutting up while drinking soju and beer until we thought it might be best to head out around midnight.

You see, the big plan was to finally go to a host bar. Or, rather, a model bar. Which as far as I can tell is a downgraded version. But in the end, we didn't have it in our hearts this weekend. It didn't help that when we walked past, they'd installed a code-lock on the door and a CCTV camera and it all just seemed too serious and complicated. We'd all had an extremely long and fairly emotional week, and didn't need large levels of complication. We just headed to one of the more low-key foreigner bars and proceeded to mind our own damn business and continue talking just with each other. Which was going fine. Until a man with a dog approached our table and seemed taken aback when we didn't leap out of our seats, cooing. He was wise and polite and dignified enough to see that we were obviously there to keep our own company for the evening, and quickly and gracefully extracted himself from the situation. His extremely inebriated friend wasn't so quick, and, instead, stood there and got himself into hotter and hotter water.

His big opening line was to ask us how long we'd been in Korea. Three years, said Grace. Two and a half, I answered. I don't think IDD even managed to get to her answer, before he backed up and said, "I'm sorry. I asked you, 'How long have you been here?'" We repeated our answers with blank faces. "Why would you want to stay so long in a country like this?"

We all three physically drew back away from him. "Wrong table," I informed him. A stupid verbal scuffle ensued, in which he accused me of being defensive because I must a. have a Korean boyfriend and b. enjoy Korean drinking culture. I informed him that he was being offensive, and pointed out that he probably wouldn't feel very comfortable if I were to, for example, point to his girlfriend of two-and-a-half years and say, "Why would you stay with that woman for so long?" I also pointed out that we didn't seem to be the ones who had had too much to drink, in regards to his second point.

There was another stupid portion of the conversation, in which he accused Grace of not being from where she's from, and not being the ethnicity which she is. At which point she informed him that she had never been so offended by any person so many times in such a short amount of time. He finally decided it would be best if he fucked the fuck off.

We finished our pitcher quickly and got the hell out of there. But we ended up being followed down the stairs by a guy who was completely taken with IDD. She told him she was sorry, but she was with her friends for the evening, and we were leaving. He hesitated for a long time and then sulked back into the bar. We were making our way down the street outside, cracking jokes about what had just occurred, when suddenly I heard the girls behind me bust out laughing. Behind us a little way's with a face as innocent as a five-year-old child's was the same guy from the stairs, being followed hesitatingly by one of his friends. He froze in the middle of the street and stared pitifully after us once we'd turned around and noticed him. His friend approached and explained that they were very sorry, that they didn't speak English, and we all stood there in probably literally the most awkward silence I've ever experienced for a few minutes.

These guys has been in the bar in the first place because they'd come to bring a birthday cake for one of the bartenders who I know for a fact is a gold-star Good Guy, so I figured they must not be so bad. We finally gave up and told them where we were headed, and said they could join if they wanted. They went back to the other bar to get the rest of their group. It was a good night of friendly (if stilted) conversation all around, while Grace and I and the rest of the guy group all just tried to keep ourselves occupied and not make it too awkward for the couple who were sitting at the end of the table clearly not being able to communicate. Eventually, the cute bartender showed up carrying his own birthday cake, and we all ate together and had one more pitcher before telling the guys we had to head out. It was nice to sit and talk with a group of men who were completely non-aggressive, over-the-top or offensive for once. Especially this weekend.

Headed out to get samgyeopsal before heading home to bed, where we spent even more time laughing until our stomachs ached before finally falling asleep. Woke up this afternoon and fooled around for a few more hours, before deciding to try to make waffles on my new waffle iron, which was sort of a complete disaster until Grace took over. They've just gone home a couple of hours ago. But not before I texted Busan and put in a request to introduce the girls to some of his friends, who are kind. The one good thing to come out of this experience this week is that I feel like we're all just completely through putting up with garbage. We're through making excuses for men and their bad behavior and atrocious opinions. Our bullshit tolerance quotas have been met, and we're on the edge about any kind of nonsense that comes our way. Who needs it? So. We'll see how that pans out.

But the important thing is, a good weekend laughing and getting back to balanced with good friends. And fuck anybody who tries to fuck with that. I'm looking at you, Obnoxious Drunk Friend-of-the-Guy-With-a-Dog Guy.

48 comments:

Steve said...

Why on earth do you think anyone wants to read this nonsense? Bragging about drunk guys hitting on you? You do realize that it's not you, it's the alcohol that makes them do that? Sober they wouldn't give your unjustifiably arrogant self the time of day, and neither would I, to be blunt.

Please, for the sake of all of us, go back to insulting your kids. Yes, it's boring and horrid writing, but it's somewhat more entertaining than your personal life which is a typhoon of bars, booze, and more booze.

AnnyongAnyang said...

Some people do like to read this "nonsense." Where exactly was she bragging? Recounting a story is not the same as bragging about it. Especially when she makes it clear that she wasn't putting up with any of the bullshit that guy was pushing. And her blog makes it abundantly clear that she cares very much about her students. If you don't like it, why bother to read it? Ahh, nevermind. Why am I talking to a troll?

I'm no Picasso said...

Steve -- What made you think they were hitting on me? They weren't. I think you're projecting.

iron said...

Steve is right, this blog is nothing but incessant bragging and a borefest to boot, too. You know your blog sucks ass when the horrendous K-pop videos that get posted are the the highlight of the blog. I absolutely dread reading this blog, but on the plus side, it's nowhere near as bad or stupid as Roboseyo's blog, perhaps you should try even harder to suck and maybe you can outdo that Canadian loser, now that's a challenge!

I'm no Picasso said...

And yet, here you are again. You just can't ignore the magnetic pull....

iron said...

Why so rude, babes? Do you really hate white men so much that you need to insult us all the time?

Yo Steve, let me know if this song is your style, if so hit me up man at seoullost AT gmail DOT com

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZuhiFYlPuo

Peace bro

I'm no Picasso said...

Hahaha oh my god. Are you actually a parody?

iron said...

What are you on, girl? A parody? Of what? How is a white heterosexual male with ripped abs that is proud of his race a pardoy of anything? Christ, I'd hate to be one of your students, no wonder Incheon always gets the lowest test scores in the entire country, with teachers of your caliber it's any wonder that they even know how to tie their shoelaces over there, or do they? Pathetic

I'm no Picasso said...

Dirty foreigner. Fuck off back to your own country.

iron said...

And you keep proving my point. You're really not presenting yourself in a good light here, why are you such a vulgar and horrid human? Now please stop disgracing my race, wench

I'm no Picasso said...

I'm sorry. You went too far with the "ripped abs" comment. I can no longer accept this as a genuinely viable case of an actual human being. There is no way you're real.

iron said...

Apology accepted. Seeing as how I am the cause of you starting to learn manners I can go to sleep tonight knowing I accomplished a little more today than just being a fantastic and awe-inspiring human being

I'm no Picasso said...

Could you please do something about your punctuation? Are you meant to be an English teacher?

iron said...

An English teacher, haha. I have a real job, one that requires a good degree and actual skill. I work for a Korean company but as soon as this contract is done I can leave this backward place and return to civilization. I'm sure it really irks you that guys like me have it good, while you have a useless degree and have no choice but to teach rude kids here for a pittance each month.

I'm no Picasso said...

Well. At least you're not an English teacher, considering you've failed to grasp even the fundamental basic of how to use a period. That's a load off my mind. Although, I have my doubts about how reputable your company could be. Have they failed to notice the fact that you're functionally illiterate?

iron said...

Oh good lord, I forgot to put a period at the end of one sentence, please crucify my white ass now. I wouldn't be so quick to nitpick if I were you, your writing is atrocious, although this is common with most bloggers. You can't write for shit so you decide to pollute the Internet with your lame thoughts on a blog instead. I would pity you but you're a drunken old tart that is beyond pity, so I'm not wasting any of it.

I'm no Picasso said...

Oh! Your run-on sentence is hurting my eyes! What is this 'useful' 'degree' you have, and who on earth decided to give it to you?

iron said...

I'm a chemical engineer and a senior member in the Brotherhood back home. Pray tell, what is your useless degree in? English lit? Philosophy? Cuntisms?

I'm no Picasso said...

A senior member of the Brotherhood? How embarrassing. They should take better care of their elderly members. If for nothing more than for their image's sake. Maybe they could take up a collection and get you in a Comp. 101 course down at the local community college.

iron said...

Was that meant to be a joke? I think delirium tremens is starting to kick in with you, best to have another gulp of soju, sweetheart.

I'm no Picasso said...

I'm not joking at all! Illiteracy within the elderly community is a serious issue. The younger, more modern members of your local clan have a responsibility to keep their seniors up to date in this modern world of "book learnin' and all such kinds of nonsense". Get those young whippersnappers in line and demand what is rightfully yours. As soon you as you get back to "civilization".

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot said...

I'm white. INP and I are friends. She hasn't insulted me yet. As a matter of fact the only people I've seen or heard her insult are pathetic self-indulgent, self-important cowards. Thank you, Iron and Steve, for proving to me that she is an immaculate judge of character.

iron said...

I find it odd that you assume I am old. We have a lot of youths in the Brotherhood, so that can't be the reason. Perhaps because I am highly qualified and not wasting my life away in Korea by drinking and talking like sailor you assume that I am of a geriatric age?

You should learn your role, woman, you despise your own race more than the other lesser races, another product of mind-numbing political correctness that has clouded your ability to think in a rational manner (if you ever were capable of doing so of course).

I'm no Picasso said...

Whiskey, you emasculated, sniveling, sorry-excuse-for-a-white-man! I bet you don't even have ripped abs!

(But you can use punctuation correctly. God does not give with both hands.)

I'm no Picasso said...

Iron, if you're not old as fuck, then I just give up. There's really no excuse for you. You should take these outs when people provide them for you. By the way, congratulations on ending up stuck in a country you despise working for people who you think are lesser than you. You're obviously doing very well for yourself.

iron said...

Thanks toots, my paycheck confirms that I am indeed doing very well for myself, despite this horrendous 2.5 month contract and dealing with idiots at work. How Korea ever bolstered their economy is beyond me - oh wait, they had white man help, of course.

Happy Valentine's Day.

(Thought I'd say it to you because it is glaringly obvious that no one else will, and a soju bottle does not count as a person, sweetie.)

I'm no Picasso said...

So you'll sell out your ethics for a paycheck, then? Snivel around with the lesser races for cash. Are your fellow clan members aware of this abomination in your moral character?

iron said...

It's my paycheck that contributes to the expansion of the Brotherhood. And although honor is important, sometimes we need to recede on it for the great good. Of course, a person with an aimless life such as yourself would have no idea about principles such as blood, honor and victory. Back to your soju, country bumpkin.

I'm no Picasso said...

The Brotherhood doesn't have its own means? You're reduced to the point of having to sell out your values to keep yourselves in the black? How humiliating. One might even start to question how great your race truly is, since you've been reduced to pandering to the weak.

iron said...

You truly are an idiot that relies on assumptions to get through life, and not fact. Name me one race that has invented more or contributed more to mankind than the white male.

Out of curiosity, what is your favorite African cuisine, and who is your favorite African author, and which African painter impresses you the most? You can also tell me what you like about African philosophy while you're at it.

I'm no Picasso said...

Wait... where did the Africans come from? Are you begging off of them as well?

iron said...

Stop skirting the issue and answer the questions about our equal brothers, the Africans. We'' move onto Asians later once you've answered my questions.

I'm no Picasso said...

You darling, diluted, sad little old man. This is where you've just gone all wrong. You see, I don't answer to you. You're a failure at life, doing something you should personally consider to be completely degrading, working under people you think you are superior to. I am a woman who you can't even put her in place. I can sit here and tell you to go fuck yourself, and you can't do a single thing about it. Just like you have to go into work everyday and make nice with the Koreans. What a blow to your pride.

Make me answer to you. If you're truly superior, you should be able to pull it off. Just like you should have Koreans working for you, and not the other way around. So go on and make it happen.

iron said...

Folks, we have just witnessed the crushing defeat of I'mnoPicassoandI'mnowherenearbeingaHemingway.

You saw it here first.

I'm no Picasso said...

You better get back to work now before your Korean boss comes in and catches you dicking around on the internet and you get fired. But thanks for the 50+ page views you've contributed to my blog today. I look forward to having you continue to up my count in the future.

iron said...

No problem, if I didn't look at your blog, hardly anyone else would.

Steve, I'm still waiting for your email, brother.

Stay white, stay proud. 88/14 WPWW!

I'm no Picasso said...

VISITOR ANALYSIS
Referrer No referring link
Host Name
IP Address 61.39.72.212 iron [Edit Label]
Country Korea, Republic Of
Region Seoul-t'ukpyolsi
City Seoul
ISP Dacom Corp.
Returning Visits 4
Visit Length 2 hours 32 mins 5 secs
VISITOR SYSTEM SPECS
Browser Firefox 3.6
Operating System WinXP
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February 14th 2011 04:13:39 PM

Haha. Seriously. Get back to work.

jennypo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
clone said...

Oh, wow, I know asshats like that guy exist, but seriously? It's entertaining to read the exchange, but Christ. Grow up, now, really.

INP, I really enjoy both of your blogs here and at Tumblr, and have been following your blog for several months. You write engaging stuff. I personally enjoy all the anecdotes other people refer to as "nonsense."

You get a huge hug of thanks from a fellow Texan for spinning some entertaining yarns. It might be isolating over there, but you are well read here at home!

Marilyn said...

Gah, I think I know where you guys were! And if I'm thinking of the right place, I almost went to that model bar too! Except my boyfriend was there that night... 아깝다. Also, this Psychobitches song on the next post is awesome - will be downloading it stat.

I'm no Picasso said...

I knew anyone who was an Incheon local would be able to work out where I was talking about. Haha. But what has happened to that place? It used to be dead all the time, and now they've installed big fuck-off doors and cameras and you can hear all kinds of nonsense going on inside. Too intimidating.

Gomushin Girl said...

I'd just like to offer my congratulations on your aquisition of anti-fans! While they're awfully hard to discipline and tend to pee on the carpets, they're a sign of your increasing positive influence in the Kblogs.

Roboseyo said...

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1926079

Funny. They name-drop me, but they usually leave my blog alone.

I'm no Picasso said...

The name-drop was the best part. As though I'd be offended by them insulting my blog, when you're the other reference point. Anyway, they're gone now. As far as anybody else will know, anyway.

Roboseyo said...

nice backhand there.

:)

by the way, have I ever told you about my ripping six-pack? Here's a picture of me I took this morning in the mirror.

http://files.myopera.com/celebfan/albums/341984/IMGDVJJ3ZBTNR.jpg

Yah, I try not to brag.

I'm no Picasso said...

Haha. One thing I do have to say for iron.... "and ripped abs" is probably and will probably stay my favorite thing anyone has ever said on this blog.

Rob-o-SE-yo said...

and for the record, it wasn't a bluff, either. When Iron sent me a photo of his dick, I could see his abs in the corner of the picture, and they were indeed ripped.

I'm no Picasso said...

Rob.... "hahahaha" is about all I'm prepared to say to that.