7.08.2011

On blogging female.

Being referred to as a "little yappy dog" when you manage to systematically deconstruct a man's very emotional reaction to something into a clear display of the multiple logistical issues it actually contains is always pleasant. A woman proves to be coolly rational and competently intelligent enough to articulate her point? Refer to her as an annoying animal and dismiss the entire conversation, without even bothering to try to articulate an argument in response.

Do you know what's actually a lot of fun? Participating in internet conversations under two separate personas -- one female, and one gender unidentified. Say the same things -- even take the "woman's side" on issues under the gender neutral account, while allowing people to presume you are male because of the way you participate in the conversation, and then see which opinion gets answered with respectful retraction of obvious logistical fallacies, and which opinion gets immediately dismissed as whining or nagging. It will teach you a lot about your place in this world, be you male or female.

Although I'm glad I did eventually start to speak clearly from the female point of view in this blog and in other spaces on the internet, sometimes I think back fondly to the days when everyone assumed I was a man. It was a lot easier to participate in conversations without automatically being chucked out on account of being noisy and hysterical. In fact, no one ever referred to me as anything of the kind, when everyone thought I was male. I was spoken to with respect, and even the oldest and most experienced male expats in Korea would take what I had to say into account. Even though I was actually completely new at the time.

If you encounter another internet persona out there who sounds suspiciously like me roaming around presenting as male, well... just know that sometimes I miss that. Being taken seriously for what I have to say, rather than constantly razzed out of the conversation with shouts of, "NEEEEER! WOMAN!!!!"

The fascinating thing is, no one ever does that to my face. At least, they never do it more than once.

Internet. I do not like you tonight.

8 comments:

Sidney said...

I wish I could line up all those men who dismiss a woman's opinion just because she is female and then run past them all with a computer's keyboard smacking them in the face.

Rachael said...

Sometimes it makes me tempted to create a blog/tumblr called "Look Out for Sexism" with the point of putting names and the blatantly obvious sexist posts up.

Turner said...

Don't take it personally. The Internet can degrading and condescending to the best of 'em.

Skeptigirl said...

I know what you mean, I like being seen as a man more too. I have no idea why I am presenting myself as a woman on my blog. I guess I am not that bright.

Flint said...

I used to help run an LPMUD many years ago. A lot of the female players were really guys. Why? Other males would go out of their way to help them, hoping they were really women and to get some cybersex.

A lot of women would make male characters so that they wouldn't be hit on all the time, could have conversation where they weren't being hit on all the time and could just enjoy the game.

What can I say a lot of the guys who mudded needed to grow up.

F5Waeg said...

Systematically deconstruct? Emotional response? ok. You made some true statements that not every waeg woman in Korea would act the way I described, but the fact that a lot of grief has come from waeg women was largely ignored. So you wouldn't do it. Cool. Doesn't change the fact that a lot of crap has come from that particular demographic.

I would like to see you deal honestly with this issue. Have you ever complained about waeg guys giving you a hard time for dating Koreans? Gomushin girl does frequently, and I've heard the complaints before. Point is before you complain about it, consider that there are plenty of waeg guys out there who wouldn't give you any grief about how you choose to live your life.

I'm no Picasso said...

Go back and read the post again, F5. I did absolutely acknowledge that. Because, unlike the impression I'm getting from you, at the time I wrote that post, almost my entire social circle in Korea consisted of foreign guys.

You, by the way, backpedaled throughout that entire situation (which, since he's decided to bring it up in my blog, everyone can see here: http://f5waeg.blogspot.com/2010/11/race-traitors.html ) until the women had exited the conversation and then posted this: http://www.flamewarriors.com/warriorshtm/cybersisters.htm

Which kind of just invalidates anything you have to say to me, really. You're not capable of rationally dealing with conversation with women, which is fine. But it has nothing to do with the way that I interact with the men who treat me with respect, and who are able to have conversations with me like adults.

F5Waeg said...

Backpedaled? Waited until the women had left the conversation? Rational?  You're the one posting about how some idiot who made a disparaging comment upset you, but then complain about how my initial post was 'emotional'.  And sorry I can't read minds and instantly know when I'm supposed to shut up as the women have left the conversation.

What you call backpedaling I see as trying to commiserate and show respect something you seem incapable of doing.  

I also stated that I didn't know for sure if you had posted anything of that sort, I used your blog as an example of waeg females dating Korean men.  That you and other female bloggers in similar situations complain about idiots isn't making an unfounded generalization, but when a waeg male does it the sky is falling.   Who is incapable of having a rational discussion on this issue?

 At least I didn't moan when some other anonymous commentator stated that she(?) wouldn't fuck most waeg guys in Korea  with someone else's vagina.